Christmas Letter 2011
Happy Holidays, everyone!
2011 is coming to an end. For both of us, it has been kind of mellow with a bit of excitement thrown in for good measure.
Stephen's work in healthcare occupies much of his time. This will be his 25th year in the seniors' facility, so he thinks they own his soul.
Stephen continues to strive for excellence in watercolour painting. Sometimes things go right. Sometimes they end up in the fireplace. Stephen has also been using Nicole's old manual Nikon camera with the zoom lens taking photos for potential paintings. He has also, with Nicole's encouragement, started writing his first screenplay. Fixing up the house and the backyard are also on his list of things to do.
For those who Stephen's mother well, she is failing due to old age and various health problems. His mother can not get out much anymore. She runs short of breath, but Stephen and his brother, George, do try and get her out and about.
Stephen's daughter, Sarah, is hard at it working in a toy store and going to university at night. Sarah received her Human Resources Certificate and is now taking Business Management courses. She has a boyfriend, Richard, who is trying to become a paramedic.
Nicole's daughter -- yes, for the ones who are scratching their heads -- Sophia and her boyfriend, Tom, moved from Kelowna to Victoria in February and moved out of our little house in May into their own tiny apartment. Thank God! Nothing like having 2 alpha females in the same household. They love each other very much, but cannot live under the same roof.
Sophia now works where both Nicole and Stephen work. She works in the laundry department. Everyone always comments on how hard she works (it's NOT the easiest job) and how much they love her melodious singing voice. Sophia still lives with her nice boyfriend, Tom, who works at a furniture & appliance store.
Both Sarah and her boyfriend, Richard, visited us in July for a week. And the two stepsisters walked about town and swapped stories about boyfriends as well as life in general.
Lastly, Stephen's love of his life, Nicole, is still working as an Activity Aide for seniors and continues to be Shop Steward. She's been in 1 major film this year and had film industry head shots done. Nicole also keeps busy writing screenplays and taking courses. She continues to outsell Stephen in art; she sold an oil painting in early September during an Arts Gala. Now, if Stephen can get her to sell another 5,000, then Stephen might be able to retire. Nicole truly does not have enough fingers in the pie!
Nicole's cousin, Robert, and his girlfriend, Elaine, bravely rode all the way from Ajax, Ontario on a motorbike in July just to see us and a couple of Elaine's relations! It was really good to connect with family for a few, too short days.
As for Nicole's parents --. Janet, her mother, continues to strive with day to day living. Any time we see her, Janet is always in a good mood. Stephen doesn't think she was ever in a bad mood. Nicole's dad, Paul, is tiring and the end is very close, but he puts up the good fight against his cancer.
That's this year's news from our perspective. May you have a Merry Christmas & a happy, healthy 2012!
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
October's Thanksgiving with my parents in Nanaimo was a mixed blessing. Dad stayed out of our hair (myself, Stephen & Mum) during the preparation. The meal was wonderfully delicious.
What I did not expect was a huge, horrible revelation which my father shared with my husband while I assisted Mum with the dishes after that lovely meal!
I always knew Dad to be a cruel, jealous man -- whether it is against his brother, me, my sister, anyone, due to his deep rooted personal insecurities.
Once my husband was alone with me that night in my parents' spare room, he shared everything with me about that fateful night from many, many years past when Uncle R. stayed with us on a business trip in Ottawa. I was about 13 years old and my sister E. was about 11 years old. It all makes sense as to why Dad so adamantly refused to support my desire to go to Sheridan College (and had terrible arguments with Mum about it). Mum privately confessed to me late Monday night (October 10th - Canadian Thanksgiving) -- Dad had strictly told Mum NEVER to tell me anything when he found out I could not remember the reason for the rift years later. Dad knew that Uncle R. was my favourite uncle and that I would attempt to renew contact with his family back then. Everyone who knows my artistic talents and me, knows that Dad tyranically held me back, but no one ever knew the real reason why. My pursuit in an arts career perhaps would have had a firm base despite my severe hearing loss. Well, what's bygone is bygone --.
When my husband told me all the details, I confessed to Stephen I could not rember the meal at all of that fateful night. All I could remember was waking up just before 1 am & seeing my poor sister Edith with her pillow clamped over her head, trying to block out the mayhem downstairs. Naturally, with my curiosity, I crept downstairs to sit on the last few steps of the stairs. It was then that I witnessed the wine glass flying across the far side of the living room and smashing against the wall. P.S., who was one of the guests that night, rushed down the hall, apologised to my Mother, who was in the kitchen, and then quickly left. Mum apparently couldn't sleep because my Father was arguing with his brother. Wide eyed, I then ran back half-way up the stairs, and continued to listen in bewilderment. First, Uncle R.'s words: "You will regret this. I will never step foot in your house ever again." And my Father's words: "I will hold you to your word, Ray."
I experienced 2 flashbacks in the wee hours of October 11th -- terrible memories flooded back to haunt me. The memories hurt me and I had at least 2 good cries.
And my Father, even though he is now near death, refuses to see his brother who wants to make peace! My Father is holding his brother to his word to the very bitter end. All this because of overdrinking. What utter stupidity!
I will write more later this holiday season.
What I did not expect was a huge, horrible revelation which my father shared with my husband while I assisted Mum with the dishes after that lovely meal!
I always knew Dad to be a cruel, jealous man -- whether it is against his brother, me, my sister, anyone, due to his deep rooted personal insecurities.
Once my husband was alone with me that night in my parents' spare room, he shared everything with me about that fateful night from many, many years past when Uncle R. stayed with us on a business trip in Ottawa. I was about 13 years old and my sister E. was about 11 years old. It all makes sense as to why Dad so adamantly refused to support my desire to go to Sheridan College (and had terrible arguments with Mum about it). Mum privately confessed to me late Monday night (October 10th - Canadian Thanksgiving) -- Dad had strictly told Mum NEVER to tell me anything when he found out I could not remember the reason for the rift years later. Dad knew that Uncle R. was my favourite uncle and that I would attempt to renew contact with his family back then. Everyone who knows my artistic talents and me, knows that Dad tyranically held me back, but no one ever knew the real reason why. My pursuit in an arts career perhaps would have had a firm base despite my severe hearing loss. Well, what's bygone is bygone --.
When my husband told me all the details, I confessed to Stephen I could not rember the meal at all of that fateful night. All I could remember was waking up just before 1 am & seeing my poor sister Edith with her pillow clamped over her head, trying to block out the mayhem downstairs. Naturally, with my curiosity, I crept downstairs to sit on the last few steps of the stairs. It was then that I witnessed the wine glass flying across the far side of the living room and smashing against the wall. P.S., who was one of the guests that night, rushed down the hall, apologised to my Mother, who was in the kitchen, and then quickly left. Mum apparently couldn't sleep because my Father was arguing with his brother. Wide eyed, I then ran back half-way up the stairs, and continued to listen in bewilderment. First, Uncle R.'s words: "You will regret this. I will never step foot in your house ever again." And my Father's words: "I will hold you to your word, Ray."
I experienced 2 flashbacks in the wee hours of October 11th -- terrible memories flooded back to haunt me. The memories hurt me and I had at least 2 good cries.
And my Father, even though he is now near death, refuses to see his brother who wants to make peace! My Father is holding his brother to his word to the very bitter end. All this because of overdrinking. What utter stupidity!
I will write more later this holiday season.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
In March, I experienced what it's like as a background actor in my 1st full-length feature film "Magic Beyond Words: the JK Rowling Story". Fun and "hurry up & wait" describe those 2 days. I learned so many terms and jargin, ie: wiper, holding area, etc.
Unfortunately, when the made for TV movie came out, it was only shown on Lifetime, an American channel. Go figure! But I do know that sooner or later, it will come out on CTV or another Canadian channel. It's a matter of waiting.
On May 5, I finished the Meisner Acting course. It had to be the toughest course I had ever taken academically or in the arts field I had ever taken. Needless to say, I persevered. It pushed me to my limit during an extremely difficult time, healthwise and at work with major Human Rights & Harassment cases, plus Labour Management meetings. (I was Chief Shop Steward -- more later.)
Due to the fact that I hadn't used my new pro camera he gave me at Christmas, Stephen pampered me to a wonderful fulfilling Mother's Day by taking me to various places: Royal Roads University Mother's Day event, Fisherman's Wharf Open House, Beacon Hill Park, etc. We took our time.
Meanwhile as things heated to boiling point at work, the Human Right Investigator and the HEU Director begged and implored me not to resign as Chief Shop Steward, I worked out a compromise. I am no longer Chief Shop Steward, but I will deal only with Human Rights & Harassment issues. I will no longer do the itty-bitty stupid cases with the workers' constant grievances that take me away from my days off. And no more Labour Management meetings unless it has to do with Human Rights & Harassment. My co-worker E.P. will do the other LMMs. What a relief!
The latest pelvic ultrasound revealed that I'm now cancer-free, however I have a hemorrhagic ovarian cyst that must be monitored. (Even though it has since popped, I'm still due for another ultrasound in September!)
I will bring more updates to this blog later.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
A long time has passed since I've sat down long enough to bring this blog up-to-date. Life's creative journey continues to be intense, passionate and hopeful despite the obstacles placed in my path and those who are close to me.
Stephen and I are shop stewards. December was a tension-filled, emotional month with lay-offs, snarky comments by co-workers Stephen and I least expected, also by the usual bullies. We tried to keep the peace while listening with compassion to those who have tears. I prayed for the storm and its aftermath to pass quickly.
ADP (Adult Day Program of the Activities Department) wasn't touched during the lay-offs. However Floor Activities positions (myself & 2 others) were reduced from full-time to part-time. I was lucky in that I was at the top in seniority and had first pick. I picked Day Time; the others were "mop up" positions. Also all LPNs & RCAs were laid off as well. Stephen has 24 years seniority, so he was able to gain another Full-Time position. Many others weren't so fortunate. So many tears, so much heartache and so much wrongly placed anger.
"Mop up" positions are those that 1) take place when I'm not there, and 2) work evenings with some overlap while I'm on.
My daughter, Sophia, and her boyfriend, T.L., arrived from Kelowna in the morning of December 24th to stay with us for the holidays. Together we enjoyed Christmas Eve Mass at St. John the Divine's Anglican Church. We all (and the cats included -- the bird stayed with Stephen's Mum) visited my Mum and Dad in Nanaimo overnight to enjoy another Christmas Dinner. Dad cough hasn't improved and is most distressing to hear. However he seemed happy to see us all. T.L. and Sophia shopped in Nanaimo a bit and later, after we returned to Victoria, they did more shopping and saw friends. A warm, wonderful Christmas Holiday was enjoyed by all.
On Sunday, January 16th, D.S. and I went to G.C.'s Memorial at James Bay New Horizons on Menzies. I shared with her a few symptoms that I had been suffering from lately that were very much like the precancer symptoms I had in 2007. D.S. was shocked. I wept heavily at one point during the service. D.S. and I shared a few recollections of G.C. with others that afternoon. D.S. remarked to me while we sipped our tea afterwards, "You cannot go before me. You're too young."
The Crones' Cauldron is down one. D.S. is too unsettled where she lives right now and A.V. is visiting her daughter in the USA while her house is up for sale, so the Crones' Cauldron Writing Group definitely has to wait.
On Saturday, January 29th, Stephen brought a large birthday cake with red and yellow roses on top, so I could share it with the senior residents who came to the Social Hour program. They sang "Happy Birthday" to me twice! As there was still a lot of cake left over, I shared the rest with staff on every floor, including the kitchen and housekeeping staff. All were touched by the offer and enjoyed the cake.
Later, Stephen treated me to a lovely vegetarian dinner at Studio 18, a restaurant o the 18th floor of a hotel. A great view of Victoria at night! The warme, sweet blueberry dessert with soft ice cream and bits of candied ginger made the evening all the more tantalizing.
On Saturday, February 5th, we celebrated Stephen's birthday at Romano's Macaroni & Grill. An opera student/waitress served him chocolate cake smothered with warm chocolate sauce topped with candles and she sang "Happy Birthday" to him in Italian!
I'm still interviewing people from the Film Industry for the Greater Victoria Film Commission's online newsletter. I've finished writing columns for a 1st Assistant Director - a nice, no nonsense chap - and an Extras Casting Director - an extremely busy, but very kind woman. I'm going to be interviewing an individual in Production next week. It never ceases to amaze me how much work goes into the making of just one film.
Since early this month, I've been going to the Greater Victoria Film Commission volunteer meetings for the Oscar Night Gala. The Gala will be held at the Grand Pacific Hotel on Sunday, February 27th. On February 1st, I've started going to the Calling All Artists' sessions at Congregation Beth Emanual, again -- once a month in preparation for the gala in the Fall. On Wednesday evenings, I'm taking my 2nd Acting course.
Tuesday evenings prove full for Stephen's Water Colour lessons. Also, he's busy browsing around shops and planning to build the new backyard fence which he hopes to complete in the summer.
Yes! We lead very busy and creative lives.
We both began our new shifts at work on February 1st, too. Our shifts have changed. Miraculously, we're now off on the same days and we go home together so we're together in the evenings -- almost-- I have Acting classes on Wednesdays and Stephen has his Water Colour classes on Tuesdays.
Stephen now works on the Dementia floor, the most emotionally draining and physically demanding until they get more lifts. I work 2nd floor in the AM and ALL floors in the PM, except on Tuesdays and Thursdays in which I concentrate on 2nd & 1st floors in PM. It's rough, but at least Stephen and I have each other.
Last Wednesday night, when I drove to my Acting course, I discovered Fisgard St (in Chinatown) all lit up with cheery red lanterns and colourful lights overhead. It proved somewhat distracting while driving. I had to really slow down. Also, a strange, yet intriguing incident happened to me after two of us fellow students assisted our acting teacher, J.M., take out an old T.V. for pick-up outside; a pigeon landed on my head just as I walked back in through the door and down the stairs! It was released back outside, however it did stay just outside the door for a very long time. Later, when I showed a huge boxful of books to J.M., he expressed his overwhelming gratitude for all the drama, script & theatre books (from my writer-friend A.V.) which I brought over that night. J.M. said, "The school's been trying to expand their library and this is a very big boost. You tell your friend that the Young Actors' School very much appreciates this gift." I enjoyed seeing the Chinese lanterns and lights again when I drive home after my class ended at 10PM. Festivities and fun things to do last for 14 days in Victoria's Chinatown.
I had been suffering from diarrhea to near diarrhea-like symptoms and feelings of nausea (no vomitting) since mid December. During one of my visits (and several tests later) to the doctor's, he (a stand-in DR for Dr. A.) gave me Nexium. When I remarked, "I was given Nexium when I had my precancer of the uterus in 2006 and 2007. It was just the way my body reacted." He stared at me for what seemed the longest time. Then he blurted, "I'm ordering a CAT Scan."
I took the Nexium as ordered, but it did NOT work -- just like in 2007. A few days later, in desperation, I walked to a well known Chinese Medical Practitioner downtown, Dr. P. I was squeezed in for an immediate appointment. His herbal medicine began working within 24 hours in controlling my nausea AND my bowels! The next time I saw him, he canned one remedy (for the nausea) and gave me medicine for my uterus/fibroids.
On Monday, February 7th, Stephen drove me to the Victoria General Hospital for my CT Scan. God knows if my fibroids are disappearing and my uterine walls are finally thinning as they should for a woman my age. I hope Dr. P.'s medicine proves to be the panacea.
We won't know the results of the CT Scan for a week -- I guess around next Monday.
That's all I'm able to share for now. :-)
Stephen and I are shop stewards. December was a tension-filled, emotional month with lay-offs, snarky comments by co-workers Stephen and I least expected, also by the usual bullies. We tried to keep the peace while listening with compassion to those who have tears. I prayed for the storm and its aftermath to pass quickly.
ADP (Adult Day Program of the Activities Department) wasn't touched during the lay-offs. However Floor Activities positions (myself & 2 others) were reduced from full-time to part-time. I was lucky in that I was at the top in seniority and had first pick. I picked Day Time; the others were "mop up" positions. Also all LPNs & RCAs were laid off as well. Stephen has 24 years seniority, so he was able to gain another Full-Time position. Many others weren't so fortunate. So many tears, so much heartache and so much wrongly placed anger.
"Mop up" positions are those that 1) take place when I'm not there, and 2) work evenings with some overlap while I'm on.
My daughter, Sophia, and her boyfriend, T.L., arrived from Kelowna in the morning of December 24th to stay with us for the holidays. Together we enjoyed Christmas Eve Mass at St. John the Divine's Anglican Church. We all (and the cats included -- the bird stayed with Stephen's Mum) visited my Mum and Dad in Nanaimo overnight to enjoy another Christmas Dinner. Dad cough hasn't improved and is most distressing to hear. However he seemed happy to see us all. T.L. and Sophia shopped in Nanaimo a bit and later, after we returned to Victoria, they did more shopping and saw friends. A warm, wonderful Christmas Holiday was enjoyed by all.
On Sunday, January 16th, D.S. and I went to G.C.'s Memorial at James Bay New Horizons on Menzies. I shared with her a few symptoms that I had been suffering from lately that were very much like the precancer symptoms I had in 2007. D.S. was shocked. I wept heavily at one point during the service. D.S. and I shared a few recollections of G.C. with others that afternoon. D.S. remarked to me while we sipped our tea afterwards, "You cannot go before me. You're too young."
The Crones' Cauldron is down one. D.S. is too unsettled where she lives right now and A.V. is visiting her daughter in the USA while her house is up for sale, so the Crones' Cauldron Writing Group definitely has to wait.
On Saturday, January 29th, Stephen brought a large birthday cake with red and yellow roses on top, so I could share it with the senior residents who came to the Social Hour program. They sang "Happy Birthday" to me twice! As there was still a lot of cake left over, I shared the rest with staff on every floor, including the kitchen and housekeeping staff. All were touched by the offer and enjoyed the cake.
Later, Stephen treated me to a lovely vegetarian dinner at Studio 18, a restaurant o the 18th floor of a hotel. A great view of Victoria at night! The warme, sweet blueberry dessert with soft ice cream and bits of candied ginger made the evening all the more tantalizing.
On Saturday, February 5th, we celebrated Stephen's birthday at Romano's Macaroni & Grill. An opera student/waitress served him chocolate cake smothered with warm chocolate sauce topped with candles and she sang "Happy Birthday" to him in Italian!
I'm still interviewing people from the Film Industry for the Greater Victoria Film Commission's online newsletter. I've finished writing columns for a 1st Assistant Director - a nice, no nonsense chap - and an Extras Casting Director - an extremely busy, but very kind woman. I'm going to be interviewing an individual in Production next week. It never ceases to amaze me how much work goes into the making of just one film.
Since early this month, I've been going to the Greater Victoria Film Commission volunteer meetings for the Oscar Night Gala. The Gala will be held at the Grand Pacific Hotel on Sunday, February 27th. On February 1st, I've started going to the Calling All Artists' sessions at Congregation Beth Emanual, again -- once a month in preparation for the gala in the Fall. On Wednesday evenings, I'm taking my 2nd Acting course.
Tuesday evenings prove full for Stephen's Water Colour lessons. Also, he's busy browsing around shops and planning to build the new backyard fence which he hopes to complete in the summer.
Yes! We lead very busy and creative lives.
We both began our new shifts at work on February 1st, too. Our shifts have changed. Miraculously, we're now off on the same days and we go home together so we're together in the evenings -- almost-- I have Acting classes on Wednesdays and Stephen has his Water Colour classes on Tuesdays.
Stephen now works on the Dementia floor, the most emotionally draining and physically demanding until they get more lifts. I work 2nd floor in the AM and ALL floors in the PM, except on Tuesdays and Thursdays in which I concentrate on 2nd & 1st floors in PM. It's rough, but at least Stephen and I have each other.
Last Wednesday night, when I drove to my Acting course, I discovered Fisgard St (in Chinatown) all lit up with cheery red lanterns and colourful lights overhead. It proved somewhat distracting while driving. I had to really slow down. Also, a strange, yet intriguing incident happened to me after two of us fellow students assisted our acting teacher, J.M., take out an old T.V. for pick-up outside; a pigeon landed on my head just as I walked back in through the door and down the stairs! It was released back outside, however it did stay just outside the door for a very long time. Later, when I showed a huge boxful of books to J.M., he expressed his overwhelming gratitude for all the drama, script & theatre books (from my writer-friend A.V.) which I brought over that night. J.M. said, "The school's been trying to expand their library and this is a very big boost. You tell your friend that the Young Actors' School very much appreciates this gift." I enjoyed seeing the Chinese lanterns and lights again when I drive home after my class ended at 10PM. Festivities and fun things to do last for 14 days in Victoria's Chinatown.
I had been suffering from diarrhea to near diarrhea-like symptoms and feelings of nausea (no vomitting) since mid December. During one of my visits (and several tests later) to the doctor's, he (a stand-in DR for Dr. A.) gave me Nexium. When I remarked, "I was given Nexium when I had my precancer of the uterus in 2006 and 2007. It was just the way my body reacted." He stared at me for what seemed the longest time. Then he blurted, "I'm ordering a CAT Scan."
I took the Nexium as ordered, but it did NOT work -- just like in 2007. A few days later, in desperation, I walked to a well known Chinese Medical Practitioner downtown, Dr. P. I was squeezed in for an immediate appointment. His herbal medicine began working within 24 hours in controlling my nausea AND my bowels! The next time I saw him, he canned one remedy (for the nausea) and gave me medicine for my uterus/fibroids.
On Monday, February 7th, Stephen drove me to the Victoria General Hospital for my CT Scan. God knows if my fibroids are disappearing and my uterine walls are finally thinning as they should for a woman my age. I hope Dr. P.'s medicine proves to be the panacea.
We won't know the results of the CT Scan for a week -- I guess around next Monday.
That's all I'm able to share for now. :-)
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