Frankly, at times, I feel quite lost without my hearing aids.:-) However with all the activity, work and chores I do, it is a relief to take them out at the end of the day. It's so nice to aeriate one's ears and to enjoy the quiet. I wonder how normal hearing people can ever meditate with all the noise in the real world! Sometimes when I go out with my husband, Stephen, I wear only one hearing aid because I'm used to his voice and I'm used to lip-reading him.

My supervisor, C.H., is desperate to get out of Sunset Lodge and into a full-time military position on the mainland some time in October/November. She and other Activity Aides want me to replace her because I'm "organized and have more than the required education." Last week, C.H. asked me if I knew the software program Excel. I replied that I used Excel when I worked for the provincial government 15 years ago, but that I have no up-to-date experience. She said that would not be a problem and that she would show me on her computer some time soon. C.H. also told me to be very aware that E.B. - my old nemesis - and Salvation Army Major L.J. "are close like glue". Apparently, C.H. has been "having tiffs" with the two. Thus I began to realize why she wants to get out, and why she (and others) want me to replace her. A few fellow workers believe I'll have more clout. (Really?) Right now, I'm hesitant. Is change good?

I interviewed a Production Designer and Set Decorator on September 19th for the Greater Victoria Film Commission online newsletter. I know at least one of the three interviews I've completed will be in their upcoming newsletter in October. (It will be their first in several years!)

The Film Commissioner, K.G., hopes to organize a Film Industry Mixer Gala some time in October or November of this year and she wants me to be the official photographer. K.G. is also aware I want to be a Location Scout trainee and/or Set Designer trainee. And she is a Location Manager in the Film Industry!

My father's health is going down. The doctors sent the results of the biopsy done on Dad's lungs to experts in Vancouver because they want a second opinion. They don't know whether to deal with his cancer in both lungs by radiation, chemo, or both.

Last Monday, my husband, Stephen, and I went to visit my parents in Nanaimo, after we visited a writer-friend, G.C., who has terminal cancer. Yes, she is one of the members of our writers' group 'The Crones' Cauldron'. All of us find this emotionally difficult, but we are persevering and our next meeting is a potluck on October 4th at her place.

A few months ago, I discovered that my sister, Edith was still alive and volunteers in the kichen at the First Metropolitan United Church. She is now off the "missing" list. Stephen and I dropped by the reception area of the church on Sunday, September 19th. I handed a gift bag to a pleasantly plump woman who works in the kitchen with Edith. The gift bag contained a knitted green scarf that I made and a handmade notecard (with photos of immediate family included) very briefly updating her on the family, plus my phone number should she wish to meet me over tea/coffee at a coffee shop. My sister, Edith, has no fixed address and is under the protective arm of that church. I received a phone call at 9PM, Thursday, September 23rd from Reverend Gordon who said that my sister does not want any contact with any family member in any way whatsoever. I immediately contacted my Mum in Nanaimo and told her, and she promised to pass on the message to my Dad.

My husband, Stephen, heard my end of the conversations while I spoke with both the Reverend and my Mum. I was so glad he was there through all that because I was able to cry on his shoulder afterwards. How tragic it is that Edith is unable to let go of the horrific childhood we both endured. I chose to forgive, let go and live my life, whereas she is still not able to do so even after all this time.

My life is full of ups and downs right now. Yes, death is part of the life cycle. Since I'm very much in the world of the living, my life has taken wings in the arts, from watercolour painting to photography to writing to the film industry. I live for myself and say "Farewell" to those who are slowly leaving this world for the next. Death and creation - the contrast is extreme and has a very jagged, cutting edge.

Various friends in the nursing field and the Activity department have teasingly asked me, "Nicole, will you still be talking to us when you become rich and famous?" My answer is always the same: "I don't see myself becoming rich and famous. Popular, yes, but not rich and famous. And of course, I'll still be talking to you." Hence I visit my writer-friend who is dying from cancer, and I continue to see friends and other family members over cups of tea.

I took the Weekend Screenwriting Blitz through the Greater Victoria Film Commission in late August. I'm naturally an intuitive writer and learned the nitty-gritty structured way of screenwriting. Very difficult. However I believe that structured writing will make my intuitive writing that much better. :-)

Last week I visited G.C., a member of our Crones' Cauldron writers' group, who is in Hospice with terminal cancer. She's in her 60's. I cannot express the depth of emotional pain I feel when seeing my writer-friend this way. I survived my bout of uterine cancer in 2007 which retreated naturally due to a genetic factor believed inherited from my Scottish grandmother. (She had bowel cancer and in between two surgeries for it, the doctors were shocked to find it had disappeared naturally.) If I could give G.C. my genes to combat her cancer, I would. I endeavor to visit G.C. again next week.

I've interviewed two amazing film industry people for the Greater Victoria Film Commission, plus I've another, a Production Designer/Set Designer, to interview on September 19th. The Film Commissioner, K.G., hopes to organize a Film Industry Mixer Gala some time in October or November of this year and she wants me to be the official photographer.

Recently, I won 2nd Prize in the Saanich Fair Photography Contest in the 'Spirit of the Fair' Category (4 PRINTS). One photo was of a horse with his ribbons just outside his stall, the second was of a llama wearing a halter with mounds of hay in the background, the third was of yellow squash, and the last was of three bright, coloured carousel horses.

Stephen also entered a lovely water colour of pink roses in the Saanich Fair Art Show/Contest. There was stiff competition as he competed with real, long-time professionals. Personally, I believe he did well and perhaps came in 5th out of 25 to 30 artists, but unfortunately there isn't a 5th Prize.

On September 2nd, the Beth Immanu-El Community had an Arts Gala at their Wings of Peace Gallery to raise funds for the restoration of the oldest synagogue in Canada. I donated 3 water colour paintings ('Wooden Angel', 'The Door' & 'Dark Angel') and was a guest speaker also for the event.

Today, I saw a want-ad, a full-time photographer position working for Lifetouch. $12 an hour plus bonus. The wage doesn't pay the mortgage. Perhaps when the mortgage is paid and I retire from the Activity Aide position I'm in -- wishful thinking.

Life is good.